Halloween is near, and thought goes into your costume for trick-or-treating, the decorations, the pumpkin, and above all, we stock up on treats. Whether you agree with Halloween or not, and collecting candies from strangers' doors is a topic for another article, but before you get dressed and do your makeup, consider your kids. Seriously. Not a year goes by that I don't have kids present in my clinic around this time of year who have suddenly developed a fear of the dark or are scared that zombies, monsters, or skeletons are hiding in the cupboard. Now, before you just laugh this off, you need to make the connection between Halloween, scary Halloween costumes, and fears and anxieties in children.
This is very real! What may be fun to you, and it may well be that your children enthusiastically join in your suggestions and ideas, can be very, very different from the reality. So imagine this: you talk about dressing up, show pictures, laugh, and work out your costumes. Come Halloween afternoon, suddenly mum presents herself in the lounge room as a nurse in costume with blood smeared all over her... hmmm... food for thought. Or you decide, and yes, your child agrees and nods their head about willingly being wrapped in bandages and smeared in fake blood, or you dress them as the bloody bride... or a zombie with missing limbs and dripping blood. I'm sure you are getting the picture.
Let's fast forward, add in a few frights and scares in the dark, and now you have a child who has developed a fear of sleeping on their own. Who constantly comes into your room at night, seeking company to sleep and seems quite upset. Usually, as I talk to this child and work through their 'What ifs...' and fears, a picture emerges slowly but clearly of Halloween and seeing their much-loved Mummy dressed as a nurse with blood all over her and the same for Daddy. Now they are scared to go to sleep, scared to sleep alone, scared to go to the toilet alone or to have a shower or be upstairs when you are downstairs. Is it worth it? No. Definitely not. So consider carefully your Halloween costume. If Halloween is today, and you are already organized, as painful as it is to change costumes last minute and throw on the one you use for book week, or the last school disco, or simply another from the dressing-up box, you will reap the rewards for many, many well-slept nights to come. Your child will thank you too.
My take-home message today is, "Don't do scary for Halloween," just do "Dress-ups instead." Be kind to your child and their emotions, try not to make life hard for them for the sake of Halloween.
Nicole Pierotti
Originally Published: October 31, 2018
Last Edited: May 31, 2023
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